“Ping Pong… Ding Dong…

I sing, my song…”

Todays topic is all about Music in games, no, not Guitar Lamer, or Cock Band, the actual sound tracks of games. Now, you might be wondering why I’m excluding those derange karaoke games. Well, it’s simple really, they’re not games. They’re pathetic cash in’s that force you to constantly buy new songs to play more. And if you’re buying the songs, then you more than likely like the band/performer and thus probably already own the CD’s to those songs, so why not pick up a hair brush and some beer and do the same thing, it’s 10 times cheaper, and 10 times more enjoyable…  Pointless… Especially considering if people put in half the time they spend fannying with these piss arse ‘games’ they would be able to play a real life instrument!

Onwards! I’m going to start this Article with Grand Theft Auto III. Yes, number 3, oddly enough, it’s 3 games before the tripe that was released with a ‘IV’ after it. It’s also, in my opinion, the best GTA game for fun. But lets not get into that. GTA3 has a special place in my heart (along with 1 and 2) for one simple reason. It has a fantastic sound track. All the good songs on GTA3 (that’s Lips106 and Head Radio stations) were written just for the game. And they clearly suit it’s strange parody on life that is echoed through out the vast city of Liberty. This is true of GTA 1 and 2 also. Flicking through the stations first time is guaranteed to be an adventure all on its own.

Pointy Things

Oooh, what to ramble about today. Hmm, Gamer Points and Trophies seem like a good thing! Bastard achievements and their false feeling of worthiness.

First things first. What are achievements? Well, they are little “tasks” that you complete within a game that gives a small icon and adds points to an overall collection of points known as your Gamerscore©®™ or, if you’re on a PS3 they’re called trophies and add towards you “Trophy Level”.

I know, you all probably know what these things are, but I thought I’d just clarify, I’ve been around the internet long enough to know that almost all the people on it are complete moronic idiots, that does not exclude myself. So what’s the point of these achievements and the such. Well, I’m going to time travel for a minute and go back to the “Land Before XBox 360″ (Don’t cry fan boy’s, or you Mother Felicity, we won’t be there long). Well, back when the 360 was going through its press releases and such before its release, Microsoft kept mentioning this thing call a ‘GamerScore©®™’ and these other things called ‘Achievements©®™’. What they said about them was something along the lines of Achievements earn you points towards your gamerscore, which is a record of all your gaming shenanigans, but they will also be used to reward the player. So going from that, what rewards have we seen in games, other than the crappy pictures, which to be fair are hardly rewards.

D’ya Know who I am?!

Oh, good old Xbox live. Over the past few months that I’ve had it (it was a gift, I’m a pc gamer and as such don’t believe in paying extra to use a pissing game feature that’s been free since its start over 10 years ago) I’ve been looking into all the nooks and cranny’s of Microsoft’s bastard child with Satan. Over all I’d call it a poor experience. Extremely poor in fact. But why? I hear you all asking in total shock, well let’s get started!

Reputation is everything…

Or not, as it is with XBL. I’ve been playing with the whole reputation thing and much to horror, it doesn’t work. Not a shock really considering the flaming thing can’t connect with a PC correctly to stream anything, but that’s for later. So what’s actually wrong with the Rep system? Well, before we go into details let me just point out that this is a very,very important part of XBL, even though Microsoft don’t seem to think so. It’s the only indication that you have of weather or not you’re playing with a total dick head. But of course, if it doesn’t work, you don’t know, at least not until the person starts effing and shitting down the mic at you. So, your games ruined before it begins.

ODST: Orbital Drop Shat Trooper

Halo: ODST, the new, old chapter in the Halo series, filling in the time between masterchief falling through the sky and him hitting his head. ODST was anounced and marketed (in my oppinion) as a whole new halo experience, different to that of any other halo game and one that would introduce new tactics and new game play styles. So, is it all what it’s hyped up to be?

I finally purchased ODST on monday (28th) after finally giving in to the temptation. I got myself the collectors edition with the nice pad, mainly becuase I have the Halo 3 XBox 360 and you can’t get the green pads that come with it. Other than the pad, you get naff all for your £60, so if you don’t want a new pad and you don’t have the halo XBox to match, don’t bother. I got myself home, had some dinner and finally got it into the love machine for some play.

Copy my Protection

*Warning, this ones big. It’s a huge subject that I personally feel very passionate about, I hope it’s a good read, though very long.

Copy protection has always been something of a controversial subject for gamers, but why is this? Is it because gamers (and by gamers I actually mean PC gamers, just because you’ve played Halo and Call of Duty on your Xbox doesn’t mean you’re a gamer) are totally uptight whiny little bitches? Admittedly they are, but there’s something more than just that. The copy protection con that causes so much grief and hassle for the PC population goes far back, back to a point beyond time itself, okay it doesn’t, but lets start with somewhere near the beginning.